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River Song

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Everybodyknowsthat everybodydiesand nobody knows it likethe Doctor.But I do think thatalltheskiesof all theworldsmight just turndarkif he ever, for one moment, accepts it.
Everybody knows that everybody dies. But not everyday.Nottoday.Some days are special. Some days are so, soblessed.Some days, nobody dies at all. Now and then, Every once in a very long while, every day in a million days, when thewindstands fair and the Doctor comes to call,everybodylives.

River Songis a fictional character played byAlex Kingstonin the British science-fiction seriesDoctor Who.Within the series' narrative, River Song is an experiencedcompanionofthe Doctor.Because she and the Doctor are both time travelers, their adventures together are largely experienced out of sequence in the chronology of each other's lives, resulting in surprising consequences for them and their unusual romantic life together, including the fact that the first time he meets her, is the last time she meets him, as she sacrifices her life to save his. In the 2011 episodeA Good Man Goes to Warit is revealed that she was bornMelody Pond,the daughter ofAmy PondandRory Williams,and in the following episode,Let's Kill Hitler,it is revealed she spent years of her life asMels,the childhood friend of her mother — and thus was in fact named afterherself.

Quotes

[edit]
  • Hello, Sweetie.
    • How she greets theDoctor.She carved it in High Gallifreyan into the home box of a category 4 Starliner as well as the oldest cliff in the universe, along with space time coordinates, in order to summon the Doctor.
    • Rephrased in what seems to be, from River's point of view, her last farewell to the Doctor: "Goodbye, Sweetie."
    • Used by theTwelfth Doctorto identify himself to River, who doesn't recognize him initially as the Doctor.
  • Spoilers.
    • Recurring admonition that she and the Doctor should not reveal what they know of each other's future, and herlast word to the Doctorbefore her corporeal death.
    • First time she heard it was after regenerating into River Song. (Let's Kill Hitler)
    • Learned to use the word from the Doctor, as seen in the First Night/Last Night minisode.
    • It appears that the Doctor had first learned to use the word from her. (Silence in the Library)
    • Used by the Twelfth Doctor to keep from telling River her future (The Husbands of River Song).
  • Oh I hate you.
    • Recurring phrase said to the Doctor when she pretends to be angry with him, to which he replies "No, you don't."
    • TheTenth Doctorunknowingly alters this pattern during his encounter with River by saying "I know" after River tells him she hates him (Forest of the Dead).

Dialogue

[edit]
I'm a time traveller. I point and laugh at archaeologists.
(31 May 2008) This is the episode in whichthe Doctor, in his 10thincarnationfirst meets River, from his perspective — and the start of their last encounter, from her perspective.
River:Hello, Sweetie.
The Doctor:Get out!

Anita:How do you know they're not androids.
River:Because I've dated androids. They're rubbish.

Mr. Lux:Who is this? You said we were the only expedition. I paid for exclusives.
River:I lied. I'm always lying. Bound to be others.

The Doctor:Oh, you're not, are you...? Tell me you're not archaeologists.
River:Got a problem with archaeologists?
The Doctor:I'm a time traveller. I point and laugh at archaeologists.
River:Ah![extending her hand for the Doctor to shake]Professor River Song. Archaeologist.

River:You think there's danger here?
The Doctor:Something came to this library and killed everything in it. Killed the whole world. Danger? Could be!
River:That was a hundred years ago. The Library's been silent for a hundred years. Whatever came here is long dead.
The Doctor:Bet your life?
River:Always.

Mr. Lux:Professor Song, why am I the only one wearing my helmet?
River:I don't fancy you.

River:Pretty Boy. With me, I said.
[The Doctor sees Donna staring at him and finally comprehends.]
The Doctor:Oh,I'mPretty Boy.
Donna:Yes.Oh, that came out a bit quick.
The Doctor:Pretty?
Donna:Meh...

River:Thanks.
The Doctor:For what?
River:The usual. For coming when I call.
The Doctor:That was you?
River:You're doing a very good job acting like you don't know me. I'm assuming there's a reason.
The Doctor:Oh, a fairly good one actually.
River:Okay, should we do diaries then?[pulls out a journal]Where are we this time? Ah, going by your face I'd say it's early days for you, yeah? So, um... Crash of the Byzantium. Have we done that yet?[the Doctor's face is blank]...Obviously ringing no bells. Alright, um. Picnic at Asgard, Have we done Asgard yet?[again, no reaction from the Doctor]...Obviously not. Blimey, very early days then. Oo! Life with a time traveller, never knew it could besuchhard work. Um...[stops, andreallylooks at him]Look at you.You'reyoung.
The Doctor:I'm really not, you know.
River:Oh but youare.Your eyes! You're younger than I've ever seen you.
The Doctor:You've seen me before then?
River:[pause]Doctor, please tell me you know who I am.
The Doctor:...Who are you?
[River looks heartbroken]

River:Sorry, you're not allowed to see inside the book. It's against the rules.
The Doctor:What rules?
River:Your rules.

Mr. Lux:I'm protecting my family's pride.
The Doctor:Well, funny thing, Mr. Lux. I don't want to see everyone in this room dead because some idiot thinks his pride is more important.
River:Then why don't you sign his contract?[the Doctor freezes]I didn't either. I'm getting worse than you.

River:There was one other thing in the last message.
Mr. Lux:That's confidential.
River:I trust this man with my life. With everything.
Mr. Lux:You've only just met him.
River:Nope, he's only just met me.

River:Whatever did this to her, whatever killed her, I'd like a word with that.
The Doctor:I'll introduce you.

The Doctor:What's in that book?
River:Spoilers.
The Doctor:Who are you?
River:Professor River Song, University of —
The Doctor:Tome.Who are you to me?
River:Again: spoilers.

The Doctor:What's that?
River:It's a screwdriver.
The Doctor:It's sonic.
River:Yeah, I know. Snap. So. What's the plan? Do we have a plan?
The Doctor:Your screwdriver. Looks exactly like mine.
River:Yeah. You gave it to me.
The Doctor:I don't give my screwdriver to anyone.
River:I'm not anyone.
The Doctor:Who are you?
(7 June 2008)

Dave:Who is he? You haven't even told us. You just expect us to trust him.
River:He's the Doctor.
Mr. Lux:And who is "The Doctor"?
River:The only story you'll ever tell. If you survive here.
Anita:You say he's your friend, but he doesn't even know who you are.
River:Listen, all you need to know is this, I trust that man to the end of the Universe. And actually, we've been.
Anita:He doesn't act like he trusts you.
River:There's a tiny problem. He hasn't met me yet.

River:What's wrong with it?
The Doctor:There's a signal coming from somewhere interfering with it.
River:Use the red settings.
The Doctor:It doesn't have a red setting.
River:Well use the dampers.
The Doctor:It doesn't have "dampers."
River:It will do one day.
The Doctor:So some time in the future I just give you my screwdriver.
River:Yeah.
The Doctor:Why would I do that?
River:I didn't pluck it from your cold dead hands if that's what you're worried about.
The Doctor:And I know that because?
River:Listen to me, you've lost your friend—you're angry, I understand. But you need to be less emotional, Doctor. Right now—
The Doctor:Less emotion— I'm not emotional!
River:There are five people in this room still alive. Focus on that. Dear god, you're hard work young.
The Doctor:Young— Who are you?!
Mr. Lux:Oh for heaven's sake! Look at the pair of you. We're all going to die right here and you're just squabbling like an old married couple!
River:Doctor. One day I'm going to be someone that you trust. Completely. But I can't wait for you to find that out. So I'm going to prove it to you. And I'm sorry. I'm really very sorry.[whispers in his ear]Are we good? Doctor. Are we good?
The Doctor:[subdued]Yeah. We're good.
River:Good.

The Doctor:Professor, go ahead. Find a safe spot.
River:It's a carnivorous swarm in a suit! You can't reason with it.
The Doctor:Five minutes.

River:You know when you see a photograph of someone you know, but it's from years before you knew them. It's like they're not quite finished; they're not done yet. Well, yes, the Doctor's here. He came when I called just like he always does, but not "my" Doctor. Now, my Doctor, I've seen whole armies turn and run away, and he'd just swagger off back to his TARDIS and open the doors with a snap of his fingers. The Doctor in the TARDIS. Next stop: everywhere.
The Doctor:Spoilers! Nobody can open the TARDIS by snapping their fingers. It doesn't work like that.
River:It does for the Doctor.
The Doctor:Iamthe Doctor.
River:Yeah. Someday.

River:Gravity Platform.
The Doctor:Bet I like you.
River:Oh, you do.

River:I hate you sometimes!
The Doctor:I know!

The Doctor:Oh no no. What are you doing? That's my job!
River:Oh and I'm not allowed to have a career I suppose.
The Doctor:Why am I handcuffed? Why would you evenhavehandcuffs?
River:[playfully flirtatious]Spoilers.

River[speaking to the handcuffed Doctor, as she realizes she must sacrifice her own life to keep the Doctor from sacrificing his]:Funny thing is, this means you've always known how I was going to die. All the time we've been together, you knew I was coming here. The last time I saw you, the real you — the future you, I mean — you turned up on my doorstep, with a new haircut and a suit. You took me to Darillium to see the singing towers. Oh, what a night that was! The towers sang and you cried. You wouldn't tell me why, but I suppose you knew it was time. My time. Time to come to the Library. You even gave me your screwdriver; that should've been a clue.[The Doctor tries unsuccessfully to reach their sonic screwdrivers]There's nothing you can do.
The Doctor:You can let me do this!
River:If you die here, it'll mean I've never met you!
The Doctor:Time can be rewritten!
River:Not those times. Not one line!Don't you dare!It's okay. It's okay, it's not over for you. You'll see me again. You've got all of that to come. You and me, time and space. You watch us run![River starts to weep]
The Doctor:River, you know my name. You whispered my name in my ear! There's only one reason I would ever tell anyone my name. There's only one time Icould.
River:[smiles sweetly at the Doctor as the countdown reaches zero]Hush, now —spoilers.

River's narration:[as the Doctor walks away from the Library]When you run with the Doctor, it feels like it'll never end, but however hard you try you can't run forever. Everybody knows that everybody dies and nobody knows it like the Doctor, but I do think that all the skies of all the worlds might just turn dark if he ever,for one moment,accepts it.
[The Doctor runs back and picks up River's sonic screwdriver]
The Doctor:Why? Why would I give her my screwdriver? Why would I do that? The thing is, future me had years to think about it. All those years to think of a way to save her, and what he did was give her a screwdriver! Why would I do that?![peels back a panel to reveal a set of green lights like on the suits, realizing why his future self has given River the screwdriver]Oh, oh,oh!Look at that! I'mverygood!
Donna:What have you done?
The Doctor:Saved her![runs with River's consciousness in the screwdriver]Stay with me! You can do it! Stay with me! Come on!! You and me, one last run![pointing his screwdriver at the Gravity Platform, turning it off]Sorry River, short cut!
[He jumps into the entrance and freefalls to the heart of the computer system while the data ghost indicator lights begin to go out. He continues to run]
River's narration:Everybody knows that everybody dies, but not every day.Not today.[The Doctor uploads her into CAL, where she is "saved" in a virtual reality, along with her fellow expeditioners killed by the Vashta Nerada]Some days are special. Some days are so, so blessed. Some days, nobody dies at all. Now and then, every once in a very long while, every day in a million days, when the wind stands fair and the Doctor comes to call,everybody lives.
(24 April 2010)
River:They've gone into warp drive. We're losing them. Stay close.
The Doctor:I'm trying!
River:Use the stabilizers.
The Doctor:It doesn't have stabilizers!
River:The blue switches.
The Doctor:The blue switches don't do anything! They're just blue.
River:Yes, they're blue. They're the blue stabilizers![she flips them and the TARDIS stabilizes]See?
The Doctor:Yeah. Well, just boring now, isn't it? They're boringers. They're blue boringers.
Amy:Doctor, how come she can fly the TARDIS?
The Doctor:You call that flying the TARDIS? Ha!
River:Okay, I've mapped the probability vectors, done a full background temporal isometry, charted the ship to its destination and...parked us right alongside.
The Doctor:"Parked us"? We haven't landed.
River:Of course we've landed. I just landed her.
The Doctor:But...it didn't make the noise.
River:What noise?
The Doctor:You know the...[attempts to imitate the wheezing, groaning noise the TARDIS usually makes when it lands]
River:It's notsupposedto make that noise.Youleave the brakes on.
The Doctor:Yeah, well, it's a brilliant noise. I love that noise.

Amy:How come you can fly the TARDIS?
River:Oh, I had lessons from the very best.
The Doctor:[flattered]Well...yeah.
River:It's a shame you were busy that day.

River Song:[preparing to inject Amy]Now, this won't hurt a bit.
Amy:Ow!
River Song:See? I lied.

Amy:You'resohis wife.
River:Oh, Amy, Amy, Amy. This is the Doctor we're talking about. Do you really think it could be anything that simple?
Amy:Yep.
River:You're good. I'm not saying you're right. But you are, very...good.
(1 May 2010)
Father Octavian[about the Doctor]:Dr. Song, I've lost good clerics today. You trust this man?
River:I absolutely trust him.
Father Octavian:He's not some kind of madman, then?
River:[pause]I absolutely trust him.

River:Father Octavian, when the Doctor's in the room, your one and only mission is to keep him alive long enough to get everyone else home. And trust me, it's not easy. Now if he's dead back there, I'll never forgive myself. And if he's alive, I'll never forgive him. And Doctor, you're standing right behind me aren't you?
The Doctor:Yeah.
River:[lovingly]Ihateyou.
The Doctor:You don't.

The Doctor:River Song, I could bloody kiss you!
River:Oh well. Maybe when you're older.

River:You. Me. Handcuffs.Must it always end this way?
The Doctor:What now?
River:The prison ship's in orbit. They'll beam me up any second. I might have done enough to earn a pardon this time. We'll see.
The Doctor:Octavian said you killed a man.
River:Yes, I did.
The Doctor:A good man.
River:A very good man. The best man I've ever known.
The Doctor:Who?
River:It's a long story, Doctor. Can't be told, has to be lived. No sneak previews. Well, except for this one: You'll see me again quite soon, whenthe Pandorica opens.
The Doctor:The Pandorica.[laughs][Leans in to River Song and whispers in her ear]That's a fairy tale.
River:[laughs]Oh, Doctor. Aren't we all?[smiles]I'll see you there.
The Doctor:I look forward to it.
River:I remember it well.
Amy Pond:[Amy walks up]Bye, River.
River Song:See you, Amy.
The Doctor:Can I trust you, River Song?
River:If you like. But where's the fun in that?[laughs][River is beamed up to the prison ship]
Amy Pond:What are you thinking?
The Doctor:[looks thoughtfully out at the ocean]Time can be rewritten.
River:[The Doctor walks in River's tent]Hello, Sweetie.
Amy Pond:River. Hi.
The Doctor:You graffitied the oldest cliff face in the universe.
River:You wouldn't answer your phone!

The Doctor:There was a goblin, or a trickster, or a warrior -- a nameless, terrible thing, soaked in the blood of a billion galaxies. The most feared being in all the cosmos, and nothing could stop it, or hold it, or reason with it. One day it would just drop out of the sky and tear down your world.
Amy:How did it end up in there?
The Doctor:You know fairy tales. A good wizard tricked it.
River:[to Amy]I hate good wizards in fairy tales;they always turn out to be him.

The Doctor:River! River, what's happening?
River:I don't know. It's the engines. Doctor, there's something wrong with the TARDIS. Like something else is controlling it.
The Doctor:You're flying it wrong!
River:I'm flying it perfectly! You taught me!

River:[upon realising she's trapped]I'm sorry, my love.
(26 June 2010)
The Doctor:Hi, honey. I'm home.
River:[looks at her watch]And what sort of time do you call this?

[The Doctor transports them to Amy and Rory]
River:Amy.[sees Rory]And the plastic Centurion.
The Doctor:It's okay, he's on our side.
River:Really? I dated a Nestene duplicate once; swappable head. It did keep things fresh. Right, then. I have questions, but number one is this: what in the name of sanity have you got on your head?
The Doctor:It's a fez. I wear a fez now.Fezzes are cool.
[River and Amy exchange a look. Amy snatches the fez and throws it into the air. River blasts it into smithereens]

Dalek:You will be exterminated!
River:Not yet. Your systems are still restoring, which means your shield density is compromised. One alpha-meson burst through your eyestalk would kill you stone dead.
Dalek:Records indicate you will show mercy. You are an associate of the Doctor's.
River:I'm River Song. Check your records again.[aims for the eye-stalk]
Dalek:[uneasily]Mercy?
River:Say it again?
Dalek:Mercy!
River:One more time.
Dalek:Mercy!!!

[After the Doctor's supposedly dead body vanishes]
AmyBut he was dead!
River:Who told you that?
Amy:He did.
River:Rule one: The Doctor lies.
Amy:Where's the Dalek?
River:[coldly]It died.

River:Did you dance? Well, you always dance at weddings, don't you?
The Doctor:I don't know. You tell me.
River:Spoilers.
The Doctor:[returns her diary and vortex manipulator]The writing's all back. I didn't peek.
River:Thank you.
The Doctor:Are you married, River?
River:Are you asking?
The Doctor:Yes.
River:Yes.
The Doctor:No, hang on, did you think I was asking you to marry me or asking if you were married?
River:Yes.
The Doctor:No, but was that yes or[pauses]yes.
River:Yes.

The Doctor:River, who are you?
River:You're going to find out very soon now, and I'm sorry, but that's when everything changes.
(23 April 2011)
[The Doctor and River quickly turn pages in their diaries]
River:All right, then. Where are we? Have we done Easter Island yet?
The Doctor:Um, yes!! I've got Easter Island!
River:Theyworshippedyou there. Have you seen the statues?

The Doctor:I'm being extremely clever up here and there's no one standing around to look impressed! What's the point in having you all?!
River:Couldn't you justslaphim sometimes?

Amy Pond:River, we can't just let him die. We have to stop it! How can you be okay with this?
River:The Doctor's death doesn't frighten me, nor does my own. There's a far worse day coming for me.

The Doctor:I'm your new undercover agent on loan from Scotland Yard. Codename: The Doctor. These are my top operatives,[indicates Amy, Rory, and River in turn]The Legs, The Nose, andMrs. Robinson.
River:Ihateyou.
The Doctor:No, you don't.

The Doctor:[smugly, just after explaining how he determined where the mysterious phone calls to President Nixon were originating from]...And Doctor Song, you've got that face on again.
River:[bemused]What face?
The Doctor:The 'He's-hot-when-he's-clever' face.
River:This is my normal face!
The Doctor[even more smugly]:Yes it is.
River:Oh, shut up.
The Doctor:[smiling]Not a chance.

The Doctor:Be careful!
River:Careful. Tried that once. Ever so dull.
The Doctor:Shout if you get into trouble.
River:Don't worry, I'mquitethe screamer.[climbs into the tunnel.]Now 'there'sa spoiler for you!
Canton:So, what’s going on here?
The Doctor:Er... Nothing. She’s just a friend.
Rory:I think he's talking about the possible alien incursion.

Rory:What did you mean, what you said to Amy? There's a worse day coming for you?
River:When I first met the Doctor, a long, long time ago, he knew all about me. Think about that. An impressionable young girl, and suddenly this man just drops out of the sky, and he's clever, and mad, and wonderful, and knows every last thing about her. Imagine what that does to a girl.
Rory:I don't really have to.
River:Trouble is, it's all back to front. My past is his future. We're traveling in opposite directions. Every time we meet, I know him more, he knows me less. I live for the days when I see him, but I know that every time that I do he'll be one step further away.The day is coming when I'll look into that man's eyes,my Doctor,and he won't have the faintest idea who I am.And I think it's going to kill me.
(30 April 2011)
The Doctor:Oh, and this is my friend, River. Nice hair. Clever. Has her own gun. And unlike me, she really doesn't mind shooting people. I shouldn't like that. Kinda do, a bit.
River:Thank you, sweetie.
The Doctor:I know you're team players and everything, but she'll definitely kill at least the first three of you.
River:Oh, the first seven, easily.
The Doctor:Seven, really?
River:Oh, eight for you, honey.
The Doctor:[flirtatiously]Stop it.
River:[flirtatiously]Make me.
The Doctor:Yeah, well, maybe I will!
Amy:[tied to a chair]Is this really important, flirting? 'Cause I feel like I should be higher on the list right now!

The Doctor:Don't let them build to full power!
River Song:I know! There's a reason why I'm shooting, honey! What are you doing?
The Doctor:Helping!
River Song:You've got a screwdriver,go build a cabinet!
The Doctor:That's really rude!
River:Shut up and drive!

River:[having slaughtered a group of Silence]My old felladidn't see that, did he? He gets ever so cross.
Rory:So...what kind of doctor are you?
River:Archaeology.[casually shoots another Silence]Love a tomb.

The Doctor:You could come with us.
River:I escape often enough, thank you. And I have a promise to live up to. You’ll understand soon enough.
The Doctor:Okay. Up to you. See you next time. Call me!
River:What? That’s it? What’s the matter with you?
The Doctor:Have I forgotten something?
River:Oh… shut up.[she kisses him]
The Doctor:Right. Okay. Interesting.
River:What’s wrong? You’re acting like we’ve never done that before.
The Doctor:We haven’t. Oh, look at the time. Must be off. But it was very nice. It was good. It was unexpected. You know what they say, “There’s a first time for everything.”
River:And a last time.
(4 June 2011) In this episode The Doctor, Amy and Rory first learn that River was born Melody, the daughter of Amy and Rory
River:[lifts the phone off the wall to speak to the guards of Stormcage]Oh, turn it off. I'm breaking in not out. This is River Song, back in her cell. Oh, and I'll take breakfast at the usual time. Thank you![dances forward, only to see a man standing in shadow]Oh, are you boys dressing as Romans now? I thought nobody read my memos.
Rory:Dr. Song, it's Rory. Sorry, have we met yet? Timestreams, I'm not quite sure where we are.
River:Yes. Yes, we've met. Hello, Rory.
Rory:What's wrong?
River:It's my birthday. The Doctor took me ice skating on the river Thames in 1814, the last of the great Frost Fairs. He got Stevie Wonder to sing for me under London Bridge.
Rory:Stevie Wonder sang in 1814?
River:Yes, he did, but you must never tell him.
Rory:I've come from the Doctor too.
River:Yes, but from a different point in time.
Rory:Unless there's two of them.
River:That's awholedifferent birthday.

Demons run when a good man goes to war.
Night will fall and drown the sun,
When a good man goes to war.
Friendship dies and true love lies.
Night will fall and the dark will rise,
When a good man goes to war.
Demons run, but count the cost.
The battle's won, but the child is lost.
  • River describing the battle of Demon's Run

River:Well then, soldier, how goes the day?
The Doctor:Where the hell have you been?! Every time you've asked I have been there. Where the hell were you today?
River:I couldn't have prevented this.
The Doctor:You could have tried!
River:And so, my love, could you.[looks toward Amy and Rory]I know you're not all right, but hold tight, Amy, because you're going to be.
The Doctor:You think I wanted this? I didn't do this! This wasn't me!
River:This was exactly you; all this. All of it. You make them so afraid. When you began all those years ago, sailing off to see the universe, did you ever think you'd become this? The man who can turn an army around at the mention of his name: Doctor. The word for healer and wise man throughout the universe. We get that word from you, you know, but if you carry on the way you are, what might that word come to mean? To the people of the Gamma Forests, the word "doctor" means "mighty warrior." How far you've come, and now they've taken a child. The child of your best friends, and they're going to turn her into a weapon, just to bring you down. And all this, my love, in fear of you.
The Doctor:...Who are you?
River:Oh look, your cot! Haven't seen that in a very long while!
The Doctor:No, you tell me. You tell me who you are!
River:[places his hand on the cot]Iamtelling you. Can't you read?
[The Doctor seeming stares at the cot, then looks at River in shock, then delight]
The Doctor:Hello!
River:[smiles]Hello.
The Doctor:[laughs]But that means --
River:I'm afraid it does.
The Doctor:[looks at Amy and Rory, then turns back to River]But you and I, we, we -[makes kissing noises]
River:Yes.
The Doctor:[looks at Amy and Rory again, then rubs hands together in glee]How do I look?
River:Amazing.
The Doctor:I'd better be.
River:Yes, you'd better be.

River:[giving Amy the prayer leaf in the cradle]It's your daughter's name, in the language of the forest.
Amy:Iknowmy daughter's name!
River Song:Except they don’t have a word for "pond," because the only water in the forest is the river. The Doctor will find your daughter and he will care for her, whatever it takes, and I know that.[slowly, the writing on the prayer leaf is translated into English, revealing the child's name: River Song]It's me. I'm Melody. I'm your daughter.
(27 August 2011) In this episode Mels, the childhood friend ofAmy Pond,is revealed to have been an previous incarnation of River
Mels:Penny in the air.[she begins regenerating withTime Lordenergies]The penny drops.
Rory:What the hell is going on?
The Doctor:Back! Back! Get back!
Mels:The last time I did this I ended up a toddler — in the middle of New York.
Amy:Okay, Doctor, explain what is happening —please.
The Doctor:[having realized the threads of destinies]"Mels", short for --
Mels:[nods in affirmation]Melody.
Amy:Yeah.I named my daughter after her.
The Doctor:You named your daughter —after your daughter.

Mels:[to Rory]Oh, shut up, Dad. I'm focusing on a dress size![screams as the regeneration process begins]
  • The last words of Mels before regenerating.

Melody:[breathless after transforming]Right. Let's see, then.[looks down at herself]Ooo, it's all going on downthere,isn't it?[puts her hands in her hair]Thehair!The hair![rushes to a mirror]It just doesn't stop, does it? Look at that. Everythingchanges!Oh, but Iloveit. Iloveit!. I'm all sorts of...mature.[spots the Doctor, puts a leg up on a chair.]Hello, Benjamin.
[The Doctor covers his eyes in embarrassment. Then, realizing, whispers "Who's Benjamin?" ]
Melody:[continuing][clicking her teeth]The teeth. The teeth. The teeth. Oh,lookat them.[goes right up to the Doctor] [flirtatious]Watch out. That bow tie! Excuse me, you lot. I need to weigh myself.[Dashes out of the room.]
  • The first words of the woman who will become River Song, upon her regeneration.

The Doctor:If you were in a hurry you could have killed me in the cornfield!
Melody:We'd only just met! I'm a psychopath. I'm notrude.[attempts to shoot the Doctor, but he has stolen the magazine from her gun]
Amy:You're not a psychopath![to the Doctor]Why would she be a psychopath?
Melody:Oh, Mummy, Mummy — pay attention. I was trained and conditioned for one purpose: I was born to kill the Doctor.
The Doctor:Demon's Run, remember? My bespoke psychopath.
Melody:I'm all yours, sweetie.[kisses him]
The Doctor:Only River Song gets to call me that.
Melody:And who is River Song?
The Doctor:An old friend of mine.
Melody:Stupid name.

Nazi officer:What are you doing here?
Melody:Well, I was on my way to this gay gypsy Bar Mitzvah for the disabled, when I suddenly thought, "Gosh, the Third Reich's a bit rubbish — I think I'll kill the Führer." Who's with me?
Nazi officer:Shoot her.
Melody:[after having been shot to no effect by a patrol of Nazis]Tip for you all — never shoot a girl while she's regenerating.

Melody:You're dying, and you stopped tochange?
The Doctor:Oh, you always waste time when you don't have any. Time is not the boss of you! Rule 408. Amelia Pond, Judgement Death Machine, why am I not surprised?[holds up a cane]Sonic cane!
Melody:Are you serious?
The Doctor:Never knowingly be serious. Rule number 27. You might want to write these down.

Melody:[having rescued Amy and Rory in the TARDIS]I seem to be able to fly her. She showed me how. She taught me. The Doctor says I am the child of the TARDIS. What does he mean?
Amy:Where is he?

[Melody returns them to the cafe, where the Doctor is dying]
Amy:[crouching over the Doctor]You can't die now. Iknowyou don't die now.
The Doctor:Oh, Pond. You've got a schedule for everything.
Amy:That doesn't make any sense.
Rory:Doctor, what do we do? Come on. How do we help you?
The Doctor:I'm sorry, Rory, you can't. Nobody can. Ponds, just listen to me. I need to talk to your daughter.[Melody crouches closely over the Doctor]Find her. Find River Song and tell her something for me.
Melody:Tell her what?[the Doctor whispers in her ear]Well, I'm sure she knows.

Amy:You're safe now. Apparently you used all your remaining regenerations in one go. You shouldn't have done that.
River:Mother, I had to try.
Amy:I know.
River:He said no one could save him — but he must have known Icould.
The Doctor:Rule one: The Doctor lies.
Nurse:She just needs to rest. She'll be absolutely fine.
The Doctor:No, she won't. She will beamazing.
(24 September 2011) In this episode, Madame Kovarian and the Silence track River down, and force her into a spacesuit at Lake Silencio, in order to kill the Doctor
Madame Kovarian:So they made you a doctor today, did they?[mockingly]Doctor River Song. How clever you are.[indicating a date in River's diary]You understand what this is, don't you?
River:According to some accounts, it's the day the Doctor dies.
Madame Kovarian:By Silencio Lake. On the Plain of Sighs. An impossible astronaut will rise from the deep, and strike the Time Lord dead.
River:It's a story.
Madame Kovarian:Andthisis where it begins.

Madame Kovarian:You never really escaped us, Melody Pond. We were always coming for you.
River:[frightened]How do you know who I am?!
Madame Kovarian:I made you what you are. The woman who kills the Doctor.
(1 October 2011) In this episode, the Doctor marries River Song, in order to persuade her to kill him, thus restoring time
[River wearing an astronaut suit, about to kill the Doctor at Lake Silencio]
The Doctor:Well then. Here we are at last.
River:I can't stop it. The suit's in control.
The Doctor:You're not supposed to. This has to happen.
River:Run.
The Doctor:Did run. Running brought me here.
River:I tried to fight it, but I can't. It's too strong.
The Doctor:I know. It's okay. This is where I die. This is a fixed point. This must happen — this always happens. Don't worry. You won't even remember this. Look over there.
River:It's me. How can I be there?
The Doctor:That's you from the future. Serving time for a murder you probably can't remember. My murder.
River:Why would you do that? Make me watch?
The Doctor:So that you know this is inevitable. And you are forgiven. Always and completely forgiven.
River:Please, my love. Please,please.Just run.
The Doctor:Can't.
River:Time can be rewritten.
The Doctor:Don't you dare..Goodbye, River.
[The Doctor closes his eyes, and flinching as he hears energy discharges, cautiously opens them as he realizes he is still alive]
River:[smiling]Hello, sweetie.
The Doctor:What have you done?!
River:Well, I think I just drained my weapons systems.
The Doctor:But this is fixed! This is a fixed point in time!
River:Fixed points can be rewritten.
The Doctor:[furious]No, they can't, of course they can't!! Who told you —
[time collapses]

River:Am I the woman who marries you? Or the woman who murders you?
The Doctor:I don't want to marry you.
River:I don't want to murder you.

River:Such a basic mistake, Madame Kovarian: take a child, raise her into the perfect psychopath, introduce her to the Doctor. Who else was I going to fall in love with?

River:Those reports of the sunspots and the solar flares, they're wrong. It's not the Sun, it's you. The sky is full of a million million voices saying, "Yes,of coursewe'll help. "You've touched so many lives, saved so many people...did you think when your time came, you'd really have to do more than justask?You've decided that the universe is better off without you — But the universe doesn't agree.
The Doctor:River, no one can help me. A fixed point has been altered. Time is disintegrating.
River:Ican'tlet you die...
The Doctor:I have to die!
River:Shut up!I can't let you die...without knowing you areloved— by so many and so much —and by no one more than me.
The Doctor:River, you and I, we know what this means:We are Ground Zero of an explosion that will engulf all reality.Billions on billions will suffer and die.
River:I'll suffer if I have to kill you.
The Doctor:More than every living thing in the universe?
River:Yes.

[River tells Amy and Rory that the Doctor is still alive]
Rory:Are you sure? Are you really sure?
River:Of course I'm sure, I'm his wife!
Amy:And I'm...[stops suddenly, realizing (and probably remembering the time she tried to seduce him)]hismother-in-law.
River:[bemused]Father dear, I think mummy might need another drink.
(29 September 2012)
River:When one's in love with an ageless god who insists on the face of a twelve-year-old, one does one's best to hide the damage.
The Doctor:It must hurt. Come here.
River:Yes. The wrist is pretty bad, too.

Amy:That gravestone, Rory's...there's room for one more name, isn't there?
The Doctor:What are you talking about? Back away from the Angel. Come back to the TARDIS. We'll figure something out.
Amy:The Angel – would it send me back to the same time, to him?
The Doctor:I don't know. Nobody knows.
Amy:But it's my best shot, yeah?
The Doctor:No!
River:Doctor, shut up! Yes! Yes, it is!
The Doctor:Amy...
Amy:Well, then. I just have to blink, right?
The Doctor:No!
Amy:It'll be fine. I know it will. I'll- I'll- I’ll be with him, like I should be. Me and Rory together.[pauses]Melody?
The Doctor:Stop it! Just- Just stop it!
[River comes forward and stands behind Amy, taking her hand]
Amy:[crying]You look after him, and you be a good girl, and you look after him.[River kisses her hand]
The Doctor:You are creating fixed time! I willneverbe able to see you again!
Amy:[sobbing harder]I'll be fine. I'll be with him.
The Doctor:[Also crying now] Amy, please, just come back into the TARDIS. Come along, Pond, please.
Amy:Raggedy man,[Amy turns to look the Doctor in the eye]goodbye!
[Amy vanishes as she is sent to the past by the angel. Amy's name appears alongside Rory's on the gravestone]
The Doctor:[sobbing]No!

[The Doctor is mourning the loss of Amy and Rory, as River flies the TARDIS.]
The Doctor:River. They were yourparents.Sorry. Didn't even think.
River:Doesn't matter.
The Doctor:Course it matters.
River:[serious]What matters is this... Doctor. Don't travel alone.
The Doctor:Travel with me, then.
[They regard one another. River smiles warmly.]
River:Whenever and wherever you want. But not all the time. One psychopath per TARDIS, don't you think?

River:Okay. This book I've got to write, Melody Malone. I presume I send it to Amy to get it published?
The Doctor:Yes. Yes.
River:I'll tell her to write an afterword. For you. Maybe you'll listen toher.
(18 May 2013)
[During the Dreamtime 'conference call', River transforms the tea into champagne.]
Jenny Flint:How did you do that?
River:Disgracefully.

River:Doctor, please listen to me. At least hear me.
[The Doctor speaks to Madame Vastra, Jenny and Strax, seemingly unaware of River's presence.]
The Doctor:Now, if I don’t come back, and I might not –
River:Doctor!
The Doctor:Go to the TARDIS. The Fast Return Protocol should be on. She'll take you home and shut herself down.
River:There has to be another way. Use the TARDIS. Use something! Save her, yes, but for God's sake, be sensible!
[River tries to slap the Doctor, but he catches her wrist]
River:How are you even doing that? I'm not really here.
The Doctor:You're always here to me. And I always listen. And I can always see you.
River:Then why didn't you speak to me?
The Doctor:Because I thought it would hurt too much.
River:I believe I could have coped.
The Doctor:No, I thought it would hurt me. And I was right[he kisses her passionately]Since no one in this room can see you, God knows how that looked.[Vastra, Jenny and Strax look awkwardly at each other]There is a time to live and a time to sleep. You are an echo, River, like Clara, like all of us in the end. My fault, I know. But you should have faded by now.
River:It's hard to leave when you haven't said goodbye.
The Doctor:Then tell me, because I don't know – how do I say it?
River:There's only one way I'd accept. If you ever loved me, say it like you're going to come back.
[The Doctor thinks for a moment]'
The Doctor:Well then...See you around, Professor River Song.
River:[smiles]Till the next time, Doctor.
The Doctor:Don't wait up.
River:Oh, and there’s one more thing.
The Doctor:Isn't there always?
River:I was mentally linked with Clara. If she's really dead, then how can I still be here?
The Doctor:Okay. How?
River:Spoilers! Goodbye, sweetie.
[River fades away. The Doctor looks at her for a final moment, before turning and stepping into his timestream]
(25 December 2015)
The Doctor:You're talking about murdering someone!
River:No, I'm not! I'mactuallymurdering someone.

The Doctor:[referring to River's diary]Is it sad?
River:Why would a diary be sad?
The Doctor:I don't know, it's just that… you look sad.
River:It's nearly full.
The Doctor:So?
River:The man who gave me thiswas the sort of man who'd know exactly how long a diary you were going to need.
The Doctor:He sounds awful.
River:I suppose he is. I've never really thought about it.
The Doctor:Not somebody special then?
River:No. But terribly useful every now and then.

Flemming:You're the woman he loves!
River:No, I'm not.
Flemming:She's lying!
River:The Doctor does not, and has never loved me. I'm not lying.
Hydroflax:{scans River}Confirmed. The lifeform is not lying.
Flemming:I-im-impossible! This is a trick!
River:No, it isn't.
Flemming:My information is correct! You are the woman who loves the Doctor!
River:Yes, I am. I never denied it. But whoever said that he loved me back? He's the Doctor. He doesn't going around falling in love with people! And if you think he's anything that small or that ordinary, then you haven't the first idea of what you're dealing with.
Flemming:Y-y-your Majesty, I assure you. She is the perfect bait. When this woman is in danger, the Doctor will always come.
River:Oh, you are a moron. No, he won't!
Flemming:He's probably already here!
River:No, he isn't! Of course he isn't!
Flemming:Possibly on this ship!
River:Well, go on! Scan it, then! Go on, why don't you?!
The Doctor:Uh, River...
River:Two hearts, stupid clothes? You can't miss him!
The Doctor:River...
River:Go on, scan the whole parsec! He's not here! God knows where he is right now, but I promise you he's doing whatever the hell he wants and not giving a damn about me! And I'm just fine with that! When you love the Doctor, it's like loving the stars themselves. You don't expect a sunset to admire you back! And if I happen to find myself in any danger, let me tell you... the Doctor isn't stupid enough or sentimental enough and he is certainly not in love enough to find himself standing in it with me...
{River stops and stares at the Doctor for a brief moment, as he smiles back at her}
The Doctor:Hello, sweetie.

River:You aresodoing those roots.
The Doctor:What, the roots of the sunset?
River:Don't you dare.
The Doctor:I'll have to check with the stars themselves.
River:Oh, shut up! I was just keeping them talking until it kicks off.

The Doctor:So... Hydroflax
River:Oh.How many times? I married thediamond.
The Doctor:So you say.
River:Elizabeth I.
The Doctor:Ramone.
River:Marilyn Monroe!
The Doctor:Stephen Fry.
River:Cleopatra.
The Doctor:Same thing.

[At the Singing Towers of Darillium]
The Doctor:Times end, River, because they have to. Because there's no such thing as happy ever after. It's just a lie we tell ourselves because the truth is so hard.
River:No, Doctor. You're wrong. Happy ever after doesn't mean forever. It just means time. A little time. But that's not the sort of thing you could ever understand, is it?
The Doctor:Mmm. What do you think of the towers?
River:I love them.
The Doctor:Then why are you ignoring them?
River:They're ignoring me. But, then, you can't expect a monolith to love you back.
The Doctor:No, you can't. They've been there for millions of years, through storms and floods and wars and… time. Nobody really understands where the music comes from. It's probably something to do with the precise positions, the distance between both towers. Even the locals aren't sure. All anyone will ever tell you is that when the wind stands fair and the night is perfect… when you least expect it… but always… when you need it the most… there is a Song.
River:So, assuming tonight is all we have left…
The Doctor:I didn't say that.
River:How long… is a night on Darillium?
The Doctor:24 years.
River:[she gasps]I hate you.
The Doctor:No, you don't.

Big Finish Audio Plays

[edit]

The Diary of River Song: The Lifeboat and the Deathboat

[edit]
The Bruce Master:The Doctor wanted rid of me.
River Song:Oh, really? The number of times he's bent over backwards to help you when you didn't deserve it!
The Bruce Master:You can't always trust the Doctor's version of events.
River Song:Oh, I know! But I trust his a lot more than yours.

The Diary of River Song: Harvest of the Krotons

[edit]
(22 August 2023)
River Song:She writes books,my mother.Every one dedicated to me. That's the only way she can tell me she loves me. And sometimes, when the leaves are falling, I go and watch them walk hand-in-hand in the park. But from a safe distance. Oh, if they ever turned, if they ever saw me waving...New Yorkwould collapse!
Jackie Tyler:New York the city?
River Song:The city.
Jackie Tyler:I couldn't loseRoselike that. What if I already have? What if she's 'round the corner, always out of sight? Oh my God!
River Song:You haven't lost Rose. You never do. I'm breaking a Law of Time telling you that.
Jackie Tyler:Or fibbing. Thanks all the same. But I am sorry about your parents.
River Song:Oh, it made me so angry for a while, I thought I wouldn't want to talk about it. But now I've said it all out loud, it feels cathartic.
Jackie Tyler:That's what a spa day is for, isn't it? The whole saving the world thing is just a bonus. It's been good for me, too. You've shown me my place in the world. That'd make your mother proud.

TheNinth DoctorAdventures: Archipelago

[edit]
(29 May 2024)
River Song:Whatever you feel about me now, I know we work it out!
The Doctor:If we work it out the way you've written, I don't want it. That's not a marriage of equals! It's you knowing more than me or me knowing more than you. Spoilers!

Quotes about River Song

[edit]
(24 April 2010)
Amy:Explain. Who is that and how did she do that museum thing?
The Doctor:It's a long story and I don't know most of it. Off we go.
Amy:What are you doing?
The Doctor:Leaving. She's got where she wants to go, let's go where we want to go.
Amy:Are you basically running away?
The Doctor:Yep.
Amy:Why?
The Doctor:'Cause she's the future. My future.
Amy:And you run away from that?
The Doctor:I can run away from anything I like. Time is not the boss of me.

Amy:Is River Song your wife? 'Cause she's someone from your future. And the way she talks to you, I've never seen anyone do that. She's kind of like, you know... "Heel, boy." She's Mrs. Doctor from the future, isn't she? Is she going to be your wife one day?
(1 May 2010)
Father Octavian:Listen to me! It's important. You can't trust her.
The Doctor:Trust who?
Father Octavian:River Song. You think you know her, but you don't. You don't understand who or what she is.
The Doctor:Then tell me.
Father Octavian:I've told you more than I should. Now please. You have to go. It's your duty to your friends.
The Doctor:Just tell me why she was in Stormcage.
Father Octavian:She killed a man. A good man. A hero to many.
The Doctor:Who?
Father Octavian:You don't want to know, sir, you really don't.
(23 April 2011)
River:You're going to have to trustusthis time.
The Doctor:Trust you? Sure.[goes right up to River]But first of all, Dr. Song, just one thing: whoareyou?[River doesn't answer.]You're someone from my future, guessing that, but who?[River still doesn't answer.]Okay. Why are you in prison? Who did you kill? Hmm?[Still no answer.]
The Doctor:[softly]Now, I love a bad girl, me. But trustyou?Seriously?
(30 April 2011)
Canton:What about Doctor Song? She dove off a rooftop!
The Doctor:Don't worry! She does that.
(1 October 2011)
Emperor Churchill:"Tick tock goes the clock," as the old song says. But they don't, do they? The clocks never tick. "Something has happened to time." That's what you say. What you never stop saying. "All of history is happening at once." But what does that mean? What happened? Explain to me in terms that I can understand. What happened to time?
The Doctor:A woman.

Emperor Churchill:You mentioned a woman.
The Doctor:Yes. I'm getting to her.
Emperor Churchill:What's she like? Attractive, I assume.
The Doctor:Hell. In high heels.
Emperor Churchill:Tell me more.

The Doctor:[frustrated by River's continued refusal to allow time to resume]River, River. Why do you have tobethis?Melody Pond.[to Amy and Rory]Yourdaughter. I hope you're bothproud.
Rory:[to Amy]I'm not sure I completely understand.
Amy:We got married and had a kid and that's her.
Rory:Okay.
(18 May 2013)
[during the Dreamtime "conference call" ]
Madame Vastra:We are awaiting only one more participant.
Strax:[annoyed]Oh, no. Not the one with the gigantic head.
Jenny:It'shair,Strax.
Strax:Hair.
[River Song appears at the conference.]
(25 December 2015)
{River has just caught a diamond in the cleavage of her dress.]
The Doctor:The diamond.
River:Good, aren't I?
The Doctor:I'm not sure "good" 's the word.
River:Better not be.

{on a crashing spaceship]
The Doctor:Get back in the TARDIS. This ismyjob.
River:This ismyjob.
The Doctor:I've been doing it longer.
River:I do it better.
The Doctor:River, not one person on this ship,not one living thing is worthyou.
River:Oryou.
(25 December 2016)
Nardole:Her name... was River Song. They were together for a while and were very happy. And then, she died, a long time ago, in a Library.

Extremis[10.6]

[edit]
Hooded Priest:Greetings, sinner.[quoting]Only in darkness are we revealed.
The Doctor:I didn't send for you.
Hooded Priest:[continuing]Goodness is not goodness that seeks advantage. Good is good in the final hour. In the deepest pit. Without hope. Without witness. Without reward. Virtue is only virtue in extremis. This is whathebelieves. And this is the reason, above all, I love him. My husband. My madman in a box. My Doctor.
[The priest is shown to be reading from River Song's diary, which he closes. He pulls back his hood to reveal himself as Nardole.]
Nardole:Your missus wouldn't approve.
The Doctor:[shocked, angry]How the hell did you get here?
Nardole:Followed you from Darillium. On the explicit orders of your late wife, River Song. Warning: I have full permission tokickyour arse.
[edit]
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