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Sickened: The Memoir of a Munchausen by Proxy Childhood
A young girl is perched on the cold chrome of yet another doctor’s examining table, missing yet another day of school. Just twelve, she’s tall, skinny, and weak. It’s four o’clock, and she hasn’t been allowed to eat anything all day. Her mother, on the other hand, seems curiously excited. She's about to suggest open-heart surgery on her child to "get to the bottom of this." She checks her teeth for lipstick and, as the doctor enters, shoots the girl a warning glance. This child will not ruin her plans.
Sickened
From early childhood, Julie Gregory was continually X-rayed, medicated, and operated on—in the vain pursuit of an illness that was created in her mother’s mind. Munchausen by proxy (MBP) is the world’s most hidden and dangerous form of child abuse, in which the caretaker—almost always the mother—invents or induces symptoms in her child because she craves the attention of medical professionals. Many MBP children die, but Julie Gregory not only survived, she escaped the powerful orbit of her mother's madness and rebuilt her identity as a vibrant, healthy young woman.
Sickened is a remarkable memoir that speaks in an original and distinctive Midwestern voice, rising to indelible scenes in prose of scathing beauty and fierce humor. Punctuated with Julie's actual medical records, it re-creates the bizarre cocoon of her family's isolated double-wide trailer, their wild shopping sprees and gun-waving confrontations, the astonishing naïveté of medical professionals and social workers. It also exposes the twisted bonds of terror and love that roped Julie's family together—including the love that made a child willing to sacrifice herself to win her mother's happiness.
The realization that the sickness lay in her mother, not in herself, would not come to Julie until adulthood. But when it did, it would strike like lightning. Through her painful metamorphosis, she discovered the courage to save her own life—and, ultimately, the life of the girl her mother had found to replace her. Sickened takes us to new places in the human heart and spirit. It is an unforgettable story, unforgettably told.
Sickened
From early childhood, Julie Gregory was continually X-rayed, medicated, and operated on—in the vain pursuit of an illness that was created in her mother’s mind. Munchausen by proxy (MBP) is the world’s most hidden and dangerous form of child abuse, in which the caretaker—almost always the mother—invents or induces symptoms in her child because she craves the attention of medical professionals. Many MBP children die, but Julie Gregory not only survived, she escaped the powerful orbit of her mother's madness and rebuilt her identity as a vibrant, healthy young woman.
Sickened is a remarkable memoir that speaks in an original and distinctive Midwestern voice, rising to indelible scenes in prose of scathing beauty and fierce humor. Punctuated with Julie's actual medical records, it re-creates the bizarre cocoon of her family's isolated double-wide trailer, their wild shopping sprees and gun-waving confrontations, the astonishing naïveté of medical professionals and social workers. It also exposes the twisted bonds of terror and love that roped Julie's family together—including the love that made a child willing to sacrifice herself to win her mother's happiness.
The realization that the sickness lay in her mother, not in herself, would not come to Julie until adulthood. But when it did, it would strike like lightning. Through her painful metamorphosis, she discovered the courage to save her own life—and, ultimately, the life of the girl her mother had found to replace her. Sickened takes us to new places in the human heart and spirit. It is an unforgettable story, unforgettably told.
244 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2003
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,479 reviews
June 1, 2015
Rewritten to protect the guilty and me from embarrassment. I wouldn't want anyone to think it was about them, especially if it was.
If she ever reads this she will never speak to me again. Oh wait, she's not speaking to me now...
If she ever reads this she will never speak to me again. Oh wait, she's not speaking to me now...
November 22, 2016
The entire time I read this book, I was screaming in my head. Giving the riot act to the doctors to the father to the social workers that turned a blind eye. I was just as bewildered and pleading as Julie as, watching the doctors slice her open when nothing was wrong.
I understood Julie. I can remember countless times, my eyes screamed volumes that no one wanted to hear or understand. And how everyone turns away, or shakes their head in disagreement but not one single adult will stand up for you. I understand what it's like to be a child confronted the rage of an adult, having done nothing to cause it. How you try to make yourself small, to try to stay out of sight. I know what it's like to try to do as many after school activities as possible because home was the last place you wanted to go back to.
This is why this story spoke volumes to me- it was the desperation. Children go through this everyday. They spend their childhood afraid, and once they hit adulthood with all these hangups-that are there no matter how well hidden they are. They have to work years at undoing what was done.. It's just so unfair.
I understood Julie. I can remember countless times, my eyes screamed volumes that no one wanted to hear or understand. And how everyone turns away, or shakes their head in disagreement but not one single adult will stand up for you. I understand what it's like to be a child confronted the rage of an adult, having done nothing to cause it. How you try to make yourself small, to try to stay out of sight. I know what it's like to try to do as many after school activities as possible because home was the last place you wanted to go back to.
This is why this story spoke volumes to me- it was the desperation. Children go through this everyday. They spend their childhood afraid, and once they hit adulthood with all these hangups-that are there no matter how well hidden they are. They have to work years at undoing what was done.. It's just so unfair.
March 7, 2019
Two stars.
You'd think something with this much drama would manage to avoid being boring, but it wasn't the case.
Munchhausen's and Munchhausen's by Proxy are fascinating syndromes. One of my favorite novels has a great example, but it's kind of spoilerific:
Unfortunately, Julie Gregory's story is not especially compelling. It reads more like a diary without the benefit of any adult perspective or introspection. It's very much "here's a list of things that happened - doctor's appointments, child abuse, tests, countless medications." The drama with her parents read more like episode of Jerry Springer. I understand her relationship with her parents directly tied into the medical side of things, but the crazy drama definitely overshadowed Julie's experiences with Munchhausen's by Proxy.
The language was so...over the top I guess is the best word? Embellished? It makes it hard to connect with the story at its core. There's only so much screaming and abuse you can read about before it all becomes a wave of blah. You have to care about the people and emotions involved, and I never got there.
I liked the inclusion of pictures of Julie's medical records, that was a nice touch. But ultimately, I wantedSickenedto be more interesting than it was.[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>
You'd think something with this much drama would manage to avoid being boring, but it wasn't the case.
Munchhausen's and Munchhausen's by Proxy are fascinating syndromes. One of my favorite novels has a great example, but it's kind of spoilerific:
Unfortunately, Julie Gregory's story is not especially compelling. It reads more like a diary without the benefit of any adult perspective or introspection. It's very much "here's a list of things that happened - doctor's appointments, child abuse, tests, countless medications." The drama with her parents read more like episode of Jerry Springer. I understand her relationship with her parents directly tied into the medical side of things, but the crazy drama definitely overshadowed Julie's experiences with Munchhausen's by Proxy.
The language was so...over the top I guess is the best word? Embellished? It makes it hard to connect with the story at its core. There's only so much screaming and abuse you can read about before it all becomes a wave of blah. You have to care about the people and emotions involved, and I never got there.
I liked the inclusion of pictures of Julie's medical records, that was a nice touch. But ultimately, I wantedSickenedto be more interesting than it was.[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>[ "br" ]>
August 11, 2008
Though Munchausen's by Proxy is a terrible disorder that causes parents to inflict grievous pain and suffering upon their trusting and powerless children, I simply was not impressed with this book. Just another "look how ****ed up my upbringing was, but by god I'm a SURVIVOR!"
There are so many survivors of so many diverse kinds of abuse, and it seems like everyone wants to write a tell-all now. Some are excellent -- e.g. "The Glass Castle" -- and some are so deliciously horrifying I couldn't stop reading --e.g. "Running with Scissors" -- but "Sickened" was redundant and padded with too many lame metaphors and not terribly compelling a read. I did read to the end because I was curious about the fate of the family, but could not identify with any of the characters. I found the experience vaguely disappointing.
There are so many survivors of so many diverse kinds of abuse, and it seems like everyone wants to write a tell-all now. Some are excellent -- e.g. "The Glass Castle" -- and some are so deliciously horrifying I couldn't stop reading --e.g. "Running with Scissors" -- but "Sickened" was redundant and padded with too many lame metaphors and not terribly compelling a read. I did read to the end because I was curious about the fate of the family, but could not identify with any of the characters. I found the experience vaguely disappointing.
August 27, 2008
Interesting novel written by a victim of Munchausen by Proxy. I've seen Munchausen in my practice and it is an ugly disease, and very diffcult at times to detect. I'm not surprised the abuse Ms. Gregory suffered went on as long as it did, because of how sneaky and insidious the disease is. She does an admirable job writing about the abuse without becoming maudlin or playing for sympathy. She seems to be a woman in charge of her own health now, and the story rings of her strength and ability to find meaning and peace in her life. I wish there had been more discussion of Munchausen and Munchausen by proxy so people who aren't familiar with it could really understand it. It is tragic that abuse is continued in families through this horrific illness and children are miserable and die because of it. It was an engrossing read and left me sad, horrified, and ultimately awed by Ms. Gregory's determination to break free of both being abused and being an abuser.
November 16, 2011
“Your reality, sir, is lies and balderdash and I'm delighted to say that I have no grasp of it whatsoever” ~ Baron Münchausen.
Hoooooolllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyy crapsickle. Julie Gregory memoirs her childhood as a munchausen by proxy victim and it’s a hell of a gawker story. Not as jarring as The Glass Castle in my opinion but still… Christ… what the hell? People really do suck.
“You looking for the suckers, honey? Here, let me get ‘em for you.”
Mom pulls out a new book of matches and carefully bends back the cover to expose two fresh red rows of the minipops she’s been giving me for as long as aI can remember. My mouth waters when I see their shimmery crimson tips. The first one is always the best, and I pluck it out and get it fast on my tongue, waiting for the metallic zolt to rush my taste buds. Once the hardest layer dissolves, I flop the match against the side of my teeth and crunch the softer bits off the stick, spitting the white flimsy paper to the floor, swallowing the rest.”
Munchausen by proxy… we’ve all seen The Sixth Sense… we remember that little girl in the tent with Haley Joel Osment. She scared the bejeezus out of me. We remember the video of her mother pouring Pine Sol into her soup, right? Yessireee…. My faith in humanity waned big time then.
Definition:“In the Münchausen by Proxy syndrome, an adult care-giver makes a child sick by either fabricating symptoms or actually causing harm to the child, whereby convincing not only the child but others, including medical providers, that their child is sick.”Named after Baron Munchausen, a german nobleman who enjoyed exaggerating and was documented in literature as a sort of ‘cry wolf’ sort.
MBP could be presented in many ways… such as the Pine Sol scene from above or say, poisoning your child with excessive amounts of salt or um….tainting your child’s urine with your own blood… In Julie Gregory’s case it included not feeding your child and then bringing them to the doctor saying that they are listless and weak (duh) or convincing the child that something is wrong with their heart and introducing doctor upon doctor until the mother (it’s usually a female caretaker) finds a doctor willing to run a battery of invasive tests to determine the problem and then screaming at the doctor when he refuses to do open heart surgery on the kid. Hmmm…
There are many incidents in this book that just scream ‘holy jumpin'josaphat!’--- her mother was a pathological liar who had grown up in an abusive situation and demanded attention at all costs. Nature versus Nurture at its best. Half the time I wasn’t sure if I felt bad for the crazy bitch or if I wanted to kick her ass. Of course the kids have little idea of what is happening, they just want to please their parents… so Julie misses school, nods and yeps when her mother explains all the symptoms that Julie has been experiencing. She lets people prod her in those very special places and she gets her chest shaved like half a dozen times so they can test her heart. If only this was all she had to endure…. her mother would often make up lies about the kids to get her husband’s attention, which could result in beatings for the kids. She would often run around their doublewide screaming how horrible her life was and the kids would have to pry the shotgun from her hand when she threatened suicide. Where was this Brady Bunch episode?
The story was a clusterfuck of events and the fact that Gregory could document this AND include photos (adds to the rubbernecking, trust me) shows a committed resolve to get people to pay attention. I was not so fond of the language… it was too flowery or too embellished making her seem more dramatic than she needed to be. Her story stands without the whole broken mirror/shattered image cliché.
Hoooooolllllllllllllllyyyyyyyyy crapsickle. Julie Gregory memoirs her childhood as a munchausen by proxy victim and it’s a hell of a gawker story. Not as jarring as The Glass Castle in my opinion but still… Christ… what the hell? People really do suck.
“You looking for the suckers, honey? Here, let me get ‘em for you.”
Mom pulls out a new book of matches and carefully bends back the cover to expose two fresh red rows of the minipops she’s been giving me for as long as aI can remember. My mouth waters when I see their shimmery crimson tips. The first one is always the best, and I pluck it out and get it fast on my tongue, waiting for the metallic zolt to rush my taste buds. Once the hardest layer dissolves, I flop the match against the side of my teeth and crunch the softer bits off the stick, spitting the white flimsy paper to the floor, swallowing the rest.”
Munchausen by proxy… we’ve all seen The Sixth Sense… we remember that little girl in the tent with Haley Joel Osment. She scared the bejeezus out of me. We remember the video of her mother pouring Pine Sol into her soup, right? Yessireee…. My faith in humanity waned big time then.
Definition:“In the Münchausen by Proxy syndrome, an adult care-giver makes a child sick by either fabricating symptoms or actually causing harm to the child, whereby convincing not only the child but others, including medical providers, that their child is sick.”Named after Baron Munchausen, a german nobleman who enjoyed exaggerating and was documented in literature as a sort of ‘cry wolf’ sort.
MBP could be presented in many ways… such as the Pine Sol scene from above or say, poisoning your child with excessive amounts of salt or um….tainting your child’s urine with your own blood… In Julie Gregory’s case it included not feeding your child and then bringing them to the doctor saying that they are listless and weak (duh) or convincing the child that something is wrong with their heart and introducing doctor upon doctor until the mother (it’s usually a female caretaker) finds a doctor willing to run a battery of invasive tests to determine the problem and then screaming at the doctor when he refuses to do open heart surgery on the kid. Hmmm…
There are many incidents in this book that just scream ‘holy jumpin'josaphat!’--- her mother was a pathological liar who had grown up in an abusive situation and demanded attention at all costs. Nature versus Nurture at its best. Half the time I wasn’t sure if I felt bad for the crazy bitch or if I wanted to kick her ass. Of course the kids have little idea of what is happening, they just want to please their parents… so Julie misses school, nods and yeps when her mother explains all the symptoms that Julie has been experiencing. She lets people prod her in those very special places and she gets her chest shaved like half a dozen times so they can test her heart. If only this was all she had to endure…. her mother would often make up lies about the kids to get her husband’s attention, which could result in beatings for the kids. She would often run around their doublewide screaming how horrible her life was and the kids would have to pry the shotgun from her hand when she threatened suicide. Where was this Brady Bunch episode?
The story was a clusterfuck of events and the fact that Gregory could document this AND include photos (adds to the rubbernecking, trust me) shows a committed resolve to get people to pay attention. I was not so fond of the language… it was too flowery or too embellished making her seem more dramatic than she needed to be. Her story stands without the whole broken mirror/shattered image cliché.
July 22, 2008
I'm not sure what to even say about this book. Most of the time I was reading it I felt just as the title says, sickened. I've read a lot of true crime and child abuse books and it never fails to resonate with me when someone can treat a child like this. This girl went through such terrible, terrible situations as a child, her mother actually succeeding in making her, along with many, many doctors and hospitals, believe she was truly sick and is still dealing with the after effects to this day. Trying time and time again to have a reltionship with either parent when both refuse to own up to what they did, the mother trying to do it all over again to another pair of children making the authors life hell still today. The things done to this child ranged from saying that she "wasn't as pretty as the other girls and never would be" to forcing her to eat an elderly mans "snot rag" (their words, not mine). I was literally sickened the whole time reading this and I'm not sure she could have ever came up with a better title for this book. I'd love the chance to speak with her mother.
May 21, 2022
Chyba pierwsza lektura, w trakcie której co kilkanaście stron fundowałam sobie odruch wymiotny. Opisy poszczególnych zabiegów, którym poddawana była autorka, to pikuś przy charakterystyce ludzkiej natury.
Jednocześnie jestem pełna podziwu, że tak makabryczną historię, można było zawrzeć w tak pięknych (czasem najprostszych, ale czy to źle?) słowach.
Jednocześnie jestem pełna podziwu, że tak makabryczną historię, można było zawrzeć w tak pięknych (czasem najprostszych, ale czy to źle?) słowach.
January 5, 2009
This book was a little disappointing. More than following the issues of Munchausen by Proxy, the author reveals more about the emotional and physical abuse her mother and father. I was expecting more detail (and I guess more Munchausen issues) then was given.
July 31, 2007
Julie Gregory grew up in an abusive household. Her mother had Munchausen by Proxy, a mental disorder that causes someone to seek attention by inflicting medical symptoms on a dependent. Throughout her childhood, Julie was told that she was sick. She was starved, beaten, and taken out of school for doctor's visits and hospital stays. Her mother insisted that every possible test be done (including invasive ones), in order to "get to the bottom of this". Julie was punished if she didn't go along with the symptoms her mother told the doctors she had. This is Julie's story of her childhood and how she finally broke free.
Readalike suggestions: For more memoirs of child abuse or mental illness, suggest "A Child Called It" by Dave Pelzer, "Wasted" by Marya Hornbacher, or even "Prozac Nation" by Elizabeth Wurtzel. For books with a similar literary tone, try "Autobiography of a Face" by Lucy Grealy or "Truth and Beauty: A Friendship" by Ann Patchett.
Readalike suggestions: For more memoirs of child abuse or mental illness, suggest "A Child Called It" by Dave Pelzer, "Wasted" by Marya Hornbacher, or even "Prozac Nation" by Elizabeth Wurtzel. For books with a similar literary tone, try "Autobiography of a Face" by Lucy Grealy or "Truth and Beauty: A Friendship" by Ann Patchett.
June 30, 2019
I studied the fascinating psychiatric disorder Münchausen’s Syndrome by Proxy for over thirty years, a condition where parents (most often mothers) sicken their children in order to receive attention and sympathy for themselves. I had seen Julie Gregory interviewed on 20/20 or Dateline when SICKENED was initially published.
As sorry as I was for the medical abuse she endured, I didn’t feel as if SICKENED added anything to the literature available on Münchausen’s or that her perspective added to my understanding of the impact of the disorder. What Gregory endured was horrendous, as is all child abuse. Because offenders doctor shop, Münchausen’s is difficult to prove and indict. Gregory’s writing was bogged down with voluminous adjectives and adverb making reading arduous rather than pleasurable.
I was interested in how Gregory recovered from her childhood, but she spent more time detailing the abuse which had less interest to me. I hope she avails herself of whatever psychiatric help she needs to be free from the impact of her childhood.
As sorry as I was for the medical abuse she endured, I didn’t feel as if SICKENED added anything to the literature available on Münchausen’s or that her perspective added to my understanding of the impact of the disorder. What Gregory endured was horrendous, as is all child abuse. Because offenders doctor shop, Münchausen’s is difficult to prove and indict. Gregory’s writing was bogged down with voluminous adjectives and adverb making reading arduous rather than pleasurable.
I was interested in how Gregory recovered from her childhood, but she spent more time detailing the abuse which had less interest to me. I hope she avails herself of whatever psychiatric help she needs to be free from the impact of her childhood.
August 14, 2008
Wow this book was disturbing, yet I was unable to put it down. It drew me in fast and kept me riveted. It a memoir of a childhood lived with a muchausen by Proxy mom. Julie was carted to doctor after doctor, made sick with pills, all sorts of terrible things. There was also physical abuse. It was hard to read it spots. A very good book, one that I think more people should read, specially hospital/doctor staff. It really gives a deep look into what a person with muchausen by proxy is like, and what it is like to be the child the mother is making sick. I was left wondering if Julie was able to get tina out of the house. Great and disturbing read.
September 2, 2021
Bardzo ciekawa książka, sam temat szalenie interesujący. Ciężko mi było czytać niektóre sceny:(
June 9, 2008
Munchausen by proxy (MBP) was not the worst of the abuse that this writer suffered as a girl; the other physical abuse and especially the emotional abuse stuck me the most. The brutality of the facts of this story reminded me a bit of one of my favorite books: Blackbird by Jennifer Lauck. The circumstances were different for each child, but neither book is for the faint of heart; the background of the writer is horrendous, and it always amazes me what some people are able to survive and at least partially overcome. It took me a while to get into the book (partly because of the style) but once I did I didn’t want to put it down. What was especially disturbing and sickening for me was having to not only absorb Julie’s story, but those of her brother, the foster kids, the elderly men, and even her father, and even her mother. It was a difficult read.
December 15, 2017
"My body, sliced, diced, and probed away from me for nothing."
July 18, 2015
This is an interesting personal account of a Munchausen by Proxy survivor.
As a "survivor" book, it's okay, though the topic itself (Munchausen) is somewhat more interesting than the writer and I don't mean that in a belittling or disrespectful way.
Much of the narrative was repetitive and felt bulky thanks to the author's penchant for metaphors, some that worked better than others.
Personally, I wish Ms. Gregory had delved further into her mother and father's histories (she gives some background, but I wanted more). I would have also appreciated more discussion of the disorder (stats, case histories, causes, treatments...etc). And I did not see the point of the excerpts from her medical records as I don't feel they added anything to her story other than proof this really happened, though the charts themselves weren't so damning.
That said, this is really a bizarre diagnosis with devastating implications and the book is competently written, if not the best of its kind.
As a "survivor" book, it's okay, though the topic itself (Munchausen) is somewhat more interesting than the writer and I don't mean that in a belittling or disrespectful way.
Much of the narrative was repetitive and felt bulky thanks to the author's penchant for metaphors, some that worked better than others.
Personally, I wish Ms. Gregory had delved further into her mother and father's histories (she gives some background, but I wanted more). I would have also appreciated more discussion of the disorder (stats, case histories, causes, treatments...etc). And I did not see the point of the excerpts from her medical records as I don't feel they added anything to her story other than proof this really happened, though the charts themselves weren't so damning.
That said, this is really a bizarre diagnosis with devastating implications and the book is competently written, if not the best of its kind.
August 26, 2016
Weirdly, ones first reaction is to want more from this book. She didn't suffer enough, she should have been sicker, her mother should have been worse (and I'm not alone in this, there's other people who echo my thoughts but just aren't aware that they're hungry for the gore). The thing is, Gregory's abuse was severe and it doesn't matter how mild a case of Munchausen's it was- if you put yourself in her place, in the body and mind o a fragile, dependent child - the experience must have been horrific. Her mother was twisted, her father turned a blind eye and she was completely alone with her trauma. Her brother, so damaged by his childhood, that he's repressed all memories of it.
Not many of us have probably experienced a perfect childhood. Even if you had fabulous parents, I'm sure there were moments that have left you a little scarred. Perhaps a heated argument between your parents? Can you remember the fear from that moment? And I bet you still carry it around with you. Imagine living with Gregory's experiences. I experienced a fair amount of damaging shit in my childhood and it's amazing how the smallest things are what I recall, my stomach churning in knots - days where dad had had enough of being as patient as a saint with mum's bullshit and finally snapped, thumping his hand on a wall making a clock fall down and smash. The terror I remember from that moment is immense! Let alone someone like Gregory whose father smacked her head into the coffee table, or whose mother ignored broken wrists for her own amusement. Or stood by nonchalantly while her daughter screamed whilst getting catheters put in. Pain and trauma isn't comparable, everyone handles and processes it differently but you can't help but feel your heart go out to Julie.
The book itself was fairly well written. Gregory's prose was a little overblown and dramatic at times, she shifted tenses frequently and the last 30 pages or so dragged on without much structure but all in all, it was an interesting account of a childhood living with a MbP mother. It must have been extremely cathartic to write and I hope that she's in a much better place these days. I also hope that her mother has been brought to justice and has had the right to have access to children stripped from her. It's so sad that this shit happens in the world.
Not many of us have probably experienced a perfect childhood. Even if you had fabulous parents, I'm sure there were moments that have left you a little scarred. Perhaps a heated argument between your parents? Can you remember the fear from that moment? And I bet you still carry it around with you. Imagine living with Gregory's experiences. I experienced a fair amount of damaging shit in my childhood and it's amazing how the smallest things are what I recall, my stomach churning in knots - days where dad had had enough of being as patient as a saint with mum's bullshit and finally snapped, thumping his hand on a wall making a clock fall down and smash. The terror I remember from that moment is immense! Let alone someone like Gregory whose father smacked her head into the coffee table, or whose mother ignored broken wrists for her own amusement. Or stood by nonchalantly while her daughter screamed whilst getting catheters put in. Pain and trauma isn't comparable, everyone handles and processes it differently but you can't help but feel your heart go out to Julie.
The book itself was fairly well written. Gregory's prose was a little overblown and dramatic at times, she shifted tenses frequently and the last 30 pages or so dragged on without much structure but all in all, it was an interesting account of a childhood living with a MbP mother. It must have been extremely cathartic to write and I hope that she's in a much better place these days. I also hope that her mother has been brought to justice and has had the right to have access to children stripped from her. It's so sad that this shit happens in the world.
March 22, 2009
This disturbing memoir is the account of a mother who intentionally invented symptoms and illness for her daughter to gain attention from medical professionals. This is known as Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome. The best pop culture example is the little girl in the Sixth Sense (Mischa Barton pre-O.C. days). I learned a lot about this syndrome from a short medical introduction; the rest of the book is Julie Gregory’s story. It is heavy, lots of adult content and language. Some of the events that happened to this girl is so sad. It is eerie to see her medical records and disappointing to see how medical professionals overlooked her explanations and implicitly trusted her mother. I feel more informed after reading this but her story truly is horrifying in many aspects and a little depressing. It seemed like she really brushed over her recovery as well, but perhaps that is because there isn’t much known about MPS and not many therapists dealing in that particular specialty.
March 12, 2011
An excellent book to read for those with a need to know and understand this complex illness. For others use your own judgement. This is a very disturbing illness that really created a lot of attention about 10 years ago in the mental health and medical field. 'Sickened' is a very well written page turner, but it is a true story...no fiction here.
January 14, 2008
I had to read this for a class in child abuse and neglect. Very disturbing, yet impossible to put down. It's a miracle the author is alive to tell her story.
June 11, 2016
A powerful memoir about a young woman's messed childhood dealing with Munchausen by Proxy (MPB) at the hands of her mother. Prior to this book I had never heard of MPB, but after reading this sordid tell all, I definitely have a grasp for how horrible it is. Basically a parent or other figure convinces you that our sick and you need to go to doctor to doctor to find out what is wrong with you. Unnecessary tests, surgeries, and being forced to lie to doctors is just the tip of the ice berg. Her parents were also mean, abusive, belligerent, and uncaring. It's a horrifying book reminiscent of "A Child Called It." It's eye opening and I hope to God, that Julie Gregory is able to move on with her life for good. Soo much trauma, I can't even imagine.
November 3, 2019
SICKENED is an eye-opening look at how sick some people can be.
If you haven't heard of it yet, this book is a first person account of growing up with a seriously mentally ill mother.
At the time Julie had no idea that being dragged to hospital after hospital was not how every child was treated. Her mother coached her on exactly what she was to say to the doctors.
The doctors were unaware that the symptoms were being faked and Julie was subjected to a litany of tests that an adult would find invasive and even painful. She even had unnecessary surgery. If Julie was not convincing enough, she was punished harshly by her mother.
When her mother was not dragging her to medical appointments and hospitals, Julie still had no escape from the abuse. At home (where she should have been able to feel safe and secure) her mother subjected her to more child abuse, including beatings and starvation.
As far as I am concerned, Julie Gregory deserves a medal for somehow finding the fortitude and inner strength to survive her horrific childhood and to grow up and become a "normal" member of society.
This is a book that needed to be written. Julie's mother was suffering from a mental disorder known as Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy. This is characterized by the person wanting the attention heaped on the mother of a sick child.
Julie Gregory has written a memoir that will stay with you probably for the rest of the reader's life. It is only through books such as this one that we, as a society, are educated about this form of child abuse, and with education comes vigilance. Now that people, especially those in the medical profession, know about this syndrome, they can watch for it and hopefully save many other children from suffering in the same way that Julie did.
I rate this book as 4 OUT OF 5 STARS ⭐⭐⭐⭐
To read more of my reviews visit my blog athttp://Amiesbookreviews.wordpress.com
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If you haven't heard of it yet, this book is a first person account of growing up with a seriously mentally ill mother.
At the time Julie had no idea that being dragged to hospital after hospital was not how every child was treated. Her mother coached her on exactly what she was to say to the doctors.
The doctors were unaware that the symptoms were being faked and Julie was subjected to a litany of tests that an adult would find invasive and even painful. She even had unnecessary surgery. If Julie was not convincing enough, she was punished harshly by her mother.
When her mother was not dragging her to medical appointments and hospitals, Julie still had no escape from the abuse. At home (where she should have been able to feel safe and secure) her mother subjected her to more child abuse, including beatings and starvation.
As far as I am concerned, Julie Gregory deserves a medal for somehow finding the fortitude and inner strength to survive her horrific childhood and to grow up and become a "normal" member of society.
This is a book that needed to be written. Julie's mother was suffering from a mental disorder known as Munchausen Syndrome By Proxy. This is characterized by the person wanting the attention heaped on the mother of a sick child.
Julie Gregory has written a memoir that will stay with you probably for the rest of the reader's life. It is only through books such as this one that we, as a society, are educated about this form of child abuse, and with education comes vigilance. Now that people, especially those in the medical profession, know about this syndrome, they can watch for it and hopefully save many other children from suffering in the same way that Julie did.
I rate this book as 4 OUT OF 5 STARS ⭐⭐⭐⭐
To read more of my reviews visit my blog athttp://Amiesbookreviews.wordpress.com
Follow me on Instagram
http://www.instagram.com/Amiesbookrev...
July 2, 2021
Det är svårt att skapa sig en åsikt om denna bok. En väldigt tung berättelse, på samma gång som den är intressant och tankeväckande.
Något som slog mig var att vi i mitt jobb ofta påpekar att det är föräldrarna som bäst känner sitt barn (för så är det, till 99%), de vet hur de mår, när de är sig själva och vilka symptom de har.
I och med denna bok ifrågasätts det påståendet. Nu är ju förstås förekomsten av MBP väldigt låg i Finland, och man kan ju tänka sig att vi kan hålla oss till det tidigare faktum att det är föräldrarna som känner sina barn bäst.
Däremot är jag väldigt "glad" över att ha fått ta del av berättelsen eftersom den är ögonöppnande och man vet aldrig när det kan vara bra att känna igen varningssignalerna när man jobbar med barn på sjukhus.
Något som slog mig var att vi i mitt jobb ofta påpekar att det är föräldrarna som bäst känner sitt barn (för så är det, till 99%), de vet hur de mår, när de är sig själva och vilka symptom de har.
I och med denna bok ifrågasätts det påståendet. Nu är ju förstås förekomsten av MBP väldigt låg i Finland, och man kan ju tänka sig att vi kan hålla oss till det tidigare faktum att det är föräldrarna som känner sina barn bäst.
Däremot är jag väldigt "glad" över att ha fått ta del av berättelsen eftersom den är ögonöppnande och man vet aldrig när det kan vara bra att känna igen varningssignalerna när man jobbar med barn på sjukhus.
February 6, 2018
There are monsters everywhere in the world. They come in all shapes and sizes, all races and religions. Some are trusted, admired and respected. Some are called friend, colleague, neighbour.
Monsters shouldnever, everbe called "Mum" or "Dad".
I really don't want to go into this too deeply because I found it to be a distressing read. The fact that Julie not only survived, but was able to tell her story is testament to her bravery.
Julie is a victim of Munchhausen By Proxy. A condition where a caregiver or spouse fabricates, exaggerates, or induces mental or physical health problems in those who are in their care, with the primary motive of gaining attention or sympathy from others. It is an extreme form of child abuse and many children do not survive.
As horrific as that is, there was also physical, verbal, and emotional abuse. Julie was beaten, starved, and subjected to situations no child should ever bear witness to. All because her mother wanted the attention.
I'm sorry, I have to cut this short. This book really distressed me. I'm glad I read it though, as horrific as it is, because I want to wing my mental love to Julie and tell her what a remarkable human being she is.
Monsters shouldnever, everbe called "Mum" or "Dad".
I really don't want to go into this too deeply because I found it to be a distressing read. The fact that Julie not only survived, but was able to tell her story is testament to her bravery.
Julie is a victim of Munchhausen By Proxy. A condition where a caregiver or spouse fabricates, exaggerates, or induces mental or physical health problems in those who are in their care, with the primary motive of gaining attention or sympathy from others. It is an extreme form of child abuse and many children do not survive.
As horrific as that is, there was also physical, verbal, and emotional abuse. Julie was beaten, starved, and subjected to situations no child should ever bear witness to. All because her mother wanted the attention.
I'm sorry, I have to cut this short. This book really distressed me. I'm glad I read it though, as horrific as it is, because I want to wing my mental love to Julie and tell her what a remarkable human being she is.
July 27, 2009
This is an amazing memoir, and I call it amazing because it never occurred to me that there were families such as Julie Gregory's. I'd heard of Munchausen by Proxy, but J. Gregory's family--not only her mother, but her father and grandparents--are all insane. Her family's lifestyle, while she was growing up, is so far out of the mainstream, that it's incredible that Julie Gregory grew up to be a functioning (and law-abiding)adult. It's a testiment to her strength and intelligence that Ms. Gregory was able to gain such perspective about what happened during her childhood, and to seek emotional freedom from it. I highly recommend this book.
April 10, 2017
READER DISCRETION IS ADVISED!!
A very disturbing story about one child's experience growing up under the care of her mothers affliction with Munchauser by proxy. I applaud the author for speaking out and sharing her explicit upbringing. I had trouble reading the details, and can only imagine the authors realities.
A very disturbing story about one child's experience growing up under the care of her mothers affliction with Munchauser by proxy. I applaud the author for speaking out and sharing her explicit upbringing. I had trouble reading the details, and can only imagine the authors realities.
June 5, 2007
Sickened is the autobiograpy of a woman who fell victim of her mother who suffered from the psychological disorder, Munchausen's by proxy, and her journey to as "normal" a life as possible.
October 11, 2018
The blurb and marketing for this book really imply that it’s about Munchausen by proxy, don’t they? Well, it mostly isn’t. It’s mostly about what a terrible person Sandy Gregory is, how abusive and how insane, plus an indictment of the author’s (also abusive) father. MBP isn’t mentioned until Gregory takes a community college psych class and concludes that the symptoms match her mother’s. She also diagnoses her father with paranoid schizophrenia;My Father’s Keeper,published a few years after this, has more on that.
Let me say frankly that I don’t like this “I checked Web MD” method of psychological evaluation. Because the book’s promotional materials emphasize that it includes real medical records, I expected something more definitive. The records do show that Gregory underwent certain procedures and accumulated a variety of strange little diagnoses; they don’t show that she was actually healthy or that she underwent unjustified operations. Kind of the opposite. I kept waiting for the big reveal that the mom was poisoning her or something, but we don’t get beyond a few episodes in which her parents—in grim, dramatic displays of abuse—make her eat disgusting things like matches and dirty tissues. Late in the book, Gregory suggests that her mother effectively starved her into a heart condition by feeding her sugary cereal and Ensure Plus. As someone who basically lived off Ensure during the first trimester of her pregnancy, I thought this was weird. Ensure Plus may taste gross and chalky, and it doesn’t compare to solids like steak and nachos, but it really is designed to replace meals and trigger weight gain—not starve you to premature death. How does this explain Gregory’s long-term ill health, or why she stayed sick after leaving home? For example, why does she “black out on the toilet” while living on her own? (Gregory says: “If everyone around you tells you you’re sick, if they keep testing you for what’s making you sick, do you think, when you’re thirteen, that you aren’t? You feel sick, right?” That makes sense, sure. But it doesn’t explain her symptoms as an adult. Her best explanation for that is that she based her later eating habits on how her mother fed her, which—again—I didn’t really follow.) This book is stuffed with descriptions of gruesome and diverse abuse, but I wondered why Gregory hasn’t included any documentation showing, e.g., the involvement of Child Protective Services, the bankruptcy, the repeated acts of fraud. She ends the book saying that she intends to report Sandy to CPS so that her adoptive children get taken away; she doesn’t say what happens. (Searching online, I read that the children were taken while CPS conducted a 90-day investigation, which ultimately concluded that no abuse occurred and returned them to the home.)
I happen to be reading another memoir of an abusive childhood right now,Educated,and the contrast began to impress me as I finished this book. Westover repeatedly checks her memories against other people’s and against her contemporaneous diary; the nature and trustworthiness of childhood memory (especially memories of trauma) are a major theme. There’s no such introspection here. Gregory’s certainty is lacerating. She even describes working for a medical facility and deliberately denying children appointments because she believes she sees in the kids’ eyes that their mothers have MBP. That creeped me out. And in the “About the Author” section, she bills herself as “an expert writer and spokesperson on Munchausen by proxy and an advocate in MBP cases.” I’m not questioning Gregory’s expertise, but for a syndrome that has (for example) hospital video surveillance of mothers suffocating their own children to trigger a code blue, I’m just disappointed not to see something more substantial and thoughtful here.
Last thing: Gregory throws in a couple bizarre asides that I found both distracting and unpleasant. Specifically, she describes (at needless length) how she entered a wet t-shirt contest to make $100. Then she justifies (at the same needless length) her decision to run away from home to go live with a man twice her age. She continues to describe herself as a “child” through her teens and into her 20s, and only in her 30s does she buy herself a bunch of mirrors and stare at her reflection because she’s finally realized that she’s physically “beautiful.” (She is mesmerized by her own attractiveness, e.g., “I catch a glimpse of myself while walking past a mirror and my face snaps into recognizing the beauty I see before me.” ) At age 31, she relies on her mom for necessities, and “for the first time, she was my mom” —she even has to live with her mother again because she’s homeless. All these things could’ve been raw and relatable, but Gregory instead comes off as bitter rather than vulnerable, cagey rather than honest, and uncomfortably reductive. Because she mentions that her parents filed “unruly child” charges against her, complete with documentation (which, it’s implied at one point, may even include pictures of the wet t-shirt contest), the oddly defensive posture of these stories make me think that there’s exculpatory evidence out there that she’s trying to preempt. But who knows. In my brief internet research, I’ve seen posts by Gregory’s mother that passionately deny the allegations in this book, claiming that Gregory was not abused but was rather a wayward unwell kid. I can’t say those posts struck me as terribly credible, either. In the end, this just wasn’t the MBP story I anticipated.
Let me say frankly that I don’t like this “I checked Web MD” method of psychological evaluation. Because the book’s promotional materials emphasize that it includes real medical records, I expected something more definitive. The records do show that Gregory underwent certain procedures and accumulated a variety of strange little diagnoses; they don’t show that she was actually healthy or that she underwent unjustified operations. Kind of the opposite. I kept waiting for the big reveal that the mom was poisoning her or something, but we don’t get beyond a few episodes in which her parents—in grim, dramatic displays of abuse—make her eat disgusting things like matches and dirty tissues. Late in the book, Gregory suggests that her mother effectively starved her into a heart condition by feeding her sugary cereal and Ensure Plus. As someone who basically lived off Ensure during the first trimester of her pregnancy, I thought this was weird. Ensure Plus may taste gross and chalky, and it doesn’t compare to solids like steak and nachos, but it really is designed to replace meals and trigger weight gain—not starve you to premature death. How does this explain Gregory’s long-term ill health, or why she stayed sick after leaving home? For example, why does she “black out on the toilet” while living on her own? (Gregory says: “If everyone around you tells you you’re sick, if they keep testing you for what’s making you sick, do you think, when you’re thirteen, that you aren’t? You feel sick, right?” That makes sense, sure. But it doesn’t explain her symptoms as an adult. Her best explanation for that is that she based her later eating habits on how her mother fed her, which—again—I didn’t really follow.) This book is stuffed with descriptions of gruesome and diverse abuse, but I wondered why Gregory hasn’t included any documentation showing, e.g., the involvement of Child Protective Services, the bankruptcy, the repeated acts of fraud. She ends the book saying that she intends to report Sandy to CPS so that her adoptive children get taken away; she doesn’t say what happens. (Searching online, I read that the children were taken while CPS conducted a 90-day investigation, which ultimately concluded that no abuse occurred and returned them to the home.)
I happen to be reading another memoir of an abusive childhood right now,Educated,and the contrast began to impress me as I finished this book. Westover repeatedly checks her memories against other people’s and against her contemporaneous diary; the nature and trustworthiness of childhood memory (especially memories of trauma) are a major theme. There’s no such introspection here. Gregory’s certainty is lacerating. She even describes working for a medical facility and deliberately denying children appointments because she believes she sees in the kids’ eyes that their mothers have MBP. That creeped me out. And in the “About the Author” section, she bills herself as “an expert writer and spokesperson on Munchausen by proxy and an advocate in MBP cases.” I’m not questioning Gregory’s expertise, but for a syndrome that has (for example) hospital video surveillance of mothers suffocating their own children to trigger a code blue, I’m just disappointed not to see something more substantial and thoughtful here.
Last thing: Gregory throws in a couple bizarre asides that I found both distracting and unpleasant. Specifically, she describes (at needless length) how she entered a wet t-shirt contest to make $100. Then she justifies (at the same needless length) her decision to run away from home to go live with a man twice her age. She continues to describe herself as a “child” through her teens and into her 20s, and only in her 30s does she buy herself a bunch of mirrors and stare at her reflection because she’s finally realized that she’s physically “beautiful.” (She is mesmerized by her own attractiveness, e.g., “I catch a glimpse of myself while walking past a mirror and my face snaps into recognizing the beauty I see before me.” ) At age 31, she relies on her mom for necessities, and “for the first time, she was my mom” —she even has to live with her mother again because she’s homeless. All these things could’ve been raw and relatable, but Gregory instead comes off as bitter rather than vulnerable, cagey rather than honest, and uncomfortably reductive. Because she mentions that her parents filed “unruly child” charges against her, complete with documentation (which, it’s implied at one point, may even include pictures of the wet t-shirt contest), the oddly defensive posture of these stories make me think that there’s exculpatory evidence out there that she’s trying to preempt. But who knows. In my brief internet research, I’ve seen posts by Gregory’s mother that passionately deny the allegations in this book, claiming that Gregory was not abused but was rather a wayward unwell kid. I can’t say those posts struck me as terribly credible, either. In the end, this just wasn’t the MBP story I anticipated.
June 16, 2021
"Przeżyłam piekło, choć nikt tego nie zauważył. Wyrwałam się z niego, choć nikt tego nie potwierdzi".
Wow wow wow. Tylko to miałam w głowie po zamknięciu tej książki. Skończyłam ją rano i im więcej czasu mija od jej przeczytania, tym ja coraz bardziej o niej myślę. Zaskoczyła mnie zupełnie, liczyłam na historię opowiedzianą mało poruszająco, ukazującą raczej suche fakty i opisy sytuacji. Nic bardziej mylnego. Sposób, w jaki autorka opisuje swoją przeszłość i świadomość, że to wszystko miało miejsce (a u niektórych WCIĄŻ MA), jest przerażająca. Po lekturze od razu zagłębiłam się w temat zespołu Münchhausena i to, co pokazują statystyki, jest straszne. Tym bardziej biorąc pod uwagę to, ile istnieje przypadków, które nie są odnotowane.
To jest książka, której ja w sposób właściwy nie opiszę. Przeszłość człowieka nie jest czymś, co się kategoryzuje, ale czymś, co należy docenić i zrozumieć na własny sposób. Ja na pewno uświadomiłam sobie jakie piekło przeżyła ta dziewczyna i przez te wszystkie strony jedyne czego chciałam, to żeby w końcu POWIEDZIAŁA MATCE, ŻE NIC JEJ NIE DOLEGA. Podporządkowana dziewczynka zbiera w sobie na to siły dopiero kilka lat później. Jednak... Komu uwierzą lekarze? Młodej dziewczynie, oskarżającej swą matkę o chorobę psychiczną, czy jej rodzinie, która wciąż pragnie jak najwięcej badań dla swego dziecka, byle tylko mu "pomóc"? No właśnie.
Całość wykonania książki - świetna. Rzetelnie podane informacje, poprzedzone kartotekami czy EKG pacjentki. Historia opowiedziana oczami dziewczyny, która to wszystko przeżyła, sprawia, że wydźwięk tej historii jest jeszcze mocniejszy i trafia do czytelnika dogłębnie. Momentami wręcz przypominała mi Szklany klosz czy Moją mroczną Vanessę ze względu na rozbudowane opisy przeżyć, ale to tylko subiektywna opinia.
Zdecydowanie warta przeczytania - nie tylko przez zainteresowanych tą tematyką. Uważam, że takie dające do myślenia książki naprawdę warto poznawać, tym bardziej, że ta historia na pewno nie da łatwo o sobie zapomnieć
Wow wow wow. Tylko to miałam w głowie po zamknięciu tej książki. Skończyłam ją rano i im więcej czasu mija od jej przeczytania, tym ja coraz bardziej o niej myślę. Zaskoczyła mnie zupełnie, liczyłam na historię opowiedzianą mało poruszająco, ukazującą raczej suche fakty i opisy sytuacji. Nic bardziej mylnego. Sposób, w jaki autorka opisuje swoją przeszłość i świadomość, że to wszystko miało miejsce (a u niektórych WCIĄŻ MA), jest przerażająca. Po lekturze od razu zagłębiłam się w temat zespołu Münchhausena i to, co pokazują statystyki, jest straszne. Tym bardziej biorąc pod uwagę to, ile istnieje przypadków, które nie są odnotowane.
To jest książka, której ja w sposób właściwy nie opiszę. Przeszłość człowieka nie jest czymś, co się kategoryzuje, ale czymś, co należy docenić i zrozumieć na własny sposób. Ja na pewno uświadomiłam sobie jakie piekło przeżyła ta dziewczyna i przez te wszystkie strony jedyne czego chciałam, to żeby w końcu POWIEDZIAŁA MATCE, ŻE NIC JEJ NIE DOLEGA. Podporządkowana dziewczynka zbiera w sobie na to siły dopiero kilka lat później. Jednak... Komu uwierzą lekarze? Młodej dziewczynie, oskarżającej swą matkę o chorobę psychiczną, czy jej rodzinie, która wciąż pragnie jak najwięcej badań dla swego dziecka, byle tylko mu "pomóc"? No właśnie.
Całość wykonania książki - świetna. Rzetelnie podane informacje, poprzedzone kartotekami czy EKG pacjentki. Historia opowiedziana oczami dziewczyny, która to wszystko przeżyła, sprawia, że wydźwięk tej historii jest jeszcze mocniejszy i trafia do czytelnika dogłębnie. Momentami wręcz przypominała mi Szklany klosz czy Moją mroczną Vanessę ze względu na rozbudowane opisy przeżyć, ale to tylko subiektywna opinia.
Zdecydowanie warta przeczytania - nie tylko przez zainteresowanych tą tematyką. Uważam, że takie dające do myślenia książki naprawdę warto poznawać, tym bardziej, że ta historia na pewno nie da łatwo o sobie zapomnieć
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April 23, 2010Its about this girl who's parents asumes shes sick and always has her missing school to take her to the doctors. The mom takes her to the doctor and tells the doctor all these simptoms she says her daughter has. The weird thing is that her daughter is not sick her mom is just making it up. Her mom takes her to a hospital where the doctor runs all these heart test because she says her daughter has a heart condition. They run several test but all of them came out negative indicating that nothing was wrong with her so they make an incision in her leg to see and hear her heart beat but still they couldnt find anything wrong with her...She ran wawy from home because she had told some one that her parents where abusing the foster kids and her self so her mom got so mad so she told her to do some work before her dad came home to give her her beating.She ran away and lived in a correctional shelter for teens. Her parents ended up turning the story back to her and making her look bad so she droped the charges she had on her parents....She went home again and bagan feeling better.She did not take pills or anything the doctors over the years prescribed. One day when she spent a night at her friends house her house had burnet down over night. Her parents got all the insurence money and her mom went to Mexico with the guy who lent them the trailer...when she came back she told Julie that her husband and planed to burned down the house and that he killed her dog..
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