Men And Women Quotes

“A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.”
― Oscar Wilde

“Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.”
― George Carlin

“He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.”
― George Carlin

“Wherever you find a great man, you will find a great mother or a great wife standing behind him -- or so they used to say. It would be interesting to know how many great women have had great fathers and husbands behind them.”
― Dorothy L. Sayers, Gaudy Night

“Men learn to love the woman they are attracted to. Women learn to become attracted to the man they fall in love with.”
― Woody Allen

“Why does a woman work ten years to change a man, then complain he's not the man she married?”
― Barbra Streisand

“A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.”
― Robert Frost

“Ladies, let me give you some advice. You can throw all your stupid fucking chick-lit, self-help, why-doesn't-he-love-me books out, because this is all you need to know: Men will treat you the way you let them. There is no such thing as" deserving "respect; you get what you demand from people.. if you demand respect, he will either respect you or he won't associate with you. It really is that simple.”
― Tucker Max, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell

“The female mind is certainly a devious one, my lord."
Vetinari looked at his secretary in surprise. "Well, of course it is. It has to deal with the male one.”
― Terry Pratchett, Unseen Academicals

“I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.”
― Stanley Baldwin

“We women, as some one says, love with our ears, just as you men love with your eyes, if you ever love at all.”
― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

“Let me give you a tip on a clue to men's characters: the man who damns money has obtained it dishonorably; the man who respects it has earned it.”
― Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

“I cannot have a man who is afraid of everything, I don't have the time to soothe insecurities and fears, I cannot have a man who is standing on a stone by a creek, watching for the fish to swim by and every time he sees a fish he says" Oh look, this fish scares me, I wonder what this fish means, this fish might mean- this, or this fish might mean- that "for God's sake, they are just fish, and they don't mean anything! Such a sad thing, so many fine, strong men standing on top of little stones, pointing at fish all the time! Such a waste! Such a waste of time! I can only have a man who will leap into the water, not minding the damn fish and whatever other little things that scare him. I need to have someone who is braver than me; if I am a pirate, he has to be the pirate Captain, if I am a pirate Captain he has to be the flying dragon.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“A man is lucky if he is the first love of a woman. A woman is lucky if she is the last love of a man.”
― Charles Dickens

“A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle."
I really hate this expression. I bet fish would totally want bicycles.”
― Meg Cabot, Princess on the Brink

“A man does what he can; a woman does what a man cannot.”
― Isabel Allende, Inés of My Soul

“The best men tell you the truth because they think you can take it; the worst men either try to preserve you in some innocent state with their false protection, or are ‘brutally honest.’ When someone tells, lets you think for yourself, experience your own emotions, he is treating you as a true equal, a friend…And the best men cook for you.”
― Whitney Otto, How to Make an American Quilt

“Women were created from the rib of man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from under his arm to be protected by him, near to his heart to be loved by him.”
― Matthew Henry, An exposition of the Old and New Testament Volume 6

“She's a woman, you're a dude. You're notsupposedto understand her. That'snotwhat she's after.... She doesn't want you to understandher.She knowsthat'simpossible. She just wants you to understandyourself.Everything else is negotiable.”
― Neal Stephenson, Snow Crash

“That's it? That's your big goodbye?" Eve asked.
Claire looked at Eve mystified. "I think I need guy CliffNotes."
"Guys aren't deep enough to need CliffNotes."
"What were you waiting for, flowery poetry?" Shane snorted. "I hugged. I'm done.”
― Rachel Caine, Lord of Misrule

“Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.”
― Charlotte Whitton

“Half of the people lie with their lips; the other half with their tears”
― Nassim Nicholas Taleb, The Bed of Procrustes: Philosophical and Practical Aphorisms

“How could you love us being together?" he asked me "We are nothing alike and we are not meant for each other and we drive each other crazy, you love that? How can you love that?" So I told him "I know that we're not meant for each other, that we drive each other crazy, and that we are so different. But that's us. That's what we have; a wild nonsense. We are not good together, but together we are bad for each other. I love us together this way just like this. Because even if it's no good, it's what we have! It's us.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“Women need to feel loved and men need to feel needed.”
― Rita Mae Brown, Riding Shotgun

“There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.”
― Will Rogers

“I have met so many heartbroken men. It's a catastrophe. Women are easily overcome by the process that happens when a boy falls in love and becomes a man. Men's hearts are so often broken. Still, you have to leave your broken heart in a place where- when the woman who knows how to see what a gift is, sees it- your broken heart can be picked up again. I think that it takes a very strong woman (inner strength) to be able to handle a man falling in love with her, without morphing into a monster (the process is a very potent process, it can poison a woman, really). A woman thinks she wants a man to fall in love with her for all the perks that come with it; but when a real love really does happen, when a real man shows his manhood; it's often too powerful a thing to endure without being poisoned. Hence, all the heartbroken men. But, I do believe that there are strong women in the world today. A few. But there are. You could say, that the mark of a real woman, is a woman who can handle a man- a man falling in love with her. A woman who can recognize that, and keep it with her.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“There will never be a good time, financially, to get married, unless you're Shaq or Ray Romano. But somehow people manage. If your man is using money as an excuse not to marry you, it's your relationship that's insecure, not his bank account.”
― Greg Behrendt, He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys

“The real thing that keeps men and women apart, is fear. Women blame men and men blame women, but the culprit is fear, women are afraid of one thing, men are afraid of a different thing; the fears of women have to do with losing while the fears of men have to do with not being good enough for something. One is loss, the other is insecurity. Men are innately more insecure than women and women are innately more needful of companionship than men. It's good for both men and women to be able to recognize and identify these fears not only within themselves, but within each other, and then men and women will see that they really do need to help each other. It's not a game, it's not a competition, the two sexes need one another.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“The difference between the love of a man and the love of a woman is that a man will always give reasons for loving, but a woman gives no reasons for loving.”
― Fulton J. Sheen, Life Is Worth Living

“Women leave their marriages when they can't take any more. Men leave when they find someone new.”
― J. Courtney Sullivan, Commencement